Trivia

The Pros And Cons Of Choice A Vibrator Over A Boyfriend( Hint: There Are More Pros)

Being single is great, I mean it. Youre free to do as you please, you dont have to remember people birthday, and you can totally binge through the new Netflix demonstrate Love while spooning Ben& Jerrys without being cast judgmental lookings from a significant other.

With such an inconsistent 7 day sexuality forecast though, the ambiguity around when youll get laid becomes ominous. L.O.S, or absence of sexuality disorder has severe and explicit symptoms. A main indicator of its onset is the urge to bellow/ text one’s ex. If you consume alcohol while suffered by L.O.S, chances are your urge will show itself into action and you may find yourself at your exs doorstep, drunk and imploring to be touched.

To offset the disorder one may invest in person a bit more consistent. And when I say someone I should say something. That something is a vibrator.

Below are the pros and cons to committing yourself to something rather than to someone :

Pros

1. Don’t need to trim the forest

No last-minute calls to Olga, your esthetician , no terrible self-inflicted shaving hacks and no rancid Nair calamities. Your vibrator wont judge or shy away from whatever youve got going on down there.

2. It won’t keep asking you is this okay ?Vibrators arent trying acceptance, its not that they dont care whether theyre pleasing you or not, its only that theyre inanimate.

3. Dont need to give a blowjob

Im sure there are women out there who dont mind sticking a penis in their mouth, hell maybe some even like it but there are literally four billion other things Id instead stick in my mouth than people genitals.

4. Don’t need to worry about STDs
Assuming you didn’t buy a secondhand electronic friend in which example WTF, theres no nervousnes around whether your vibrator is packing the silent killer HPV, my old friend chlamydia or gross herpes.

5. Netflix THEN Chill

A vibrator won’t oppose to the choice of Netflix show you want to watch during a clich Netflix sesh. But the best part is youll actually make it through a full movie before having an orgasm.

6. Dont need to worry about protection

Forget racking your brain trying to remember if you took your birth control , no need to stumble for a condom and when you eventually do find one, you wont have to watch him are working to get it on. This is a nice segue into…

7. No Pregnancy

Nuff said.

8. Dont need to move much

Had a long day at work and you don’t feel like doing the reverse cowgirl? You’re in luck because you’re not going to have to expend much energy with this little guy…or big guy, depending on your budget.

9. Don’t need to be in good shape

Your vibrator loves your winter body or, going to play the its inanimate card again- it doesn’t know any better. Did you feed four slicings of pizza too many? No need to feel self-conscious!

10. Guaranteed orgasm

There is no possibility of faking it , no chance your partners going to bust early and unlike your ex Greg, you know where your clit is located.

Cons

1. Batteries are expensive

$ 5 for a pack of Duracels every few weeks can add up. But whats more important than an orgasm ?!

2. When person asks when the last period you had sexuality was, this doesnt counting .It may feel awkward having girl talk with your BFFs and everyones ranting about boy drama while a great big issue is the new vibrator you bought isnt waterproofed and you wanted to try shower sexuality this week.

3. Your vibrator doesn’t count as a +1

As wedding season approaches, you and your electric penis are going strong. Unfortunately, it may be inappropriate to counting it as a guest at your best friends wedding.

4. Cant introduce it to your mothers

Hey mom, dad, Id like you to meet…disappointment! I havent personally gone this far but Id imagine its awkward AF to introduce your vibrator to the family.

***

Well, turns out there are many more pros to having a pseudo boyfriend than there are cons. Im sure it isnt all gumdrops and rainbows but to be honest, I havent experienced anything but only that. If youre suffered by L.O.S speak to your doctor about prescribing the Lover Fire 6.5 ” Medical Silicone Realistic Dildo Shape G place Clitoral Stimulation Vibrator from Amazon today.

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